Q: What do you say when your own child that was raised in a Christian home and was active in church – now says that they don’t believe the Bible is from God. They believe that it was changed with each translation. They believe there is a God – but not in the Bible and they do not believe or like church at all. Help!
A: If your child is open to discussions or reading, you can have conversations along the lines of what you’ve seen on this blog. For instance, there is a lot of data that clearly refutes the issue of the Bible changing with each translation. If your child is not open to these kind of conversations, forcing them is of little help; I know from experience. So then, what do we parents do?
As difficult as it is, I think we follow the lead of the father in the Parable of the Prodigal Son. We allow them to be people with free will and make choices, even if they are bad. I’m not saying we abdicate our position as parents, but that position changes with the age of our children; as one person said to me, “we remain responsible to our children, but no longer responsible for them.” The father let his child go his own way, even with a blessing he didn’t deserve. Then each day, as he went on living his life and working and relating with his other children, he eagerly watched the horizon, ready to embrace his child when the child came to his senses.
For us, I think that looks like daily prayer; by us and by our friends and family. Not the kind of prayer that demands the next thing that happens or that we say to be THE thing that turns our child around, but the kind that is for the long haul. The hard part, especially in our society, is often the child comes over the hill not because of coming to his senses, but just to take more from us. That’s hard, and tough love may be called for. But continue to pray as an act of love to that child, regardless of outcomes.
Then, we live out our faith. We live consistently with Christ’s principles. I found that I was pushing Jesus, but living my life and treating my child with anger, bitterness, fear and frustration. Jesus doesn’t do that. So we find safe, appropriate places to properly deal with our junk, and then we deal with our kids like Christ-centered parents. Easy to say, tough to do, but I think like a lot of things, the hard route is the right one.
Remember, teens and young adults are looking to form their own identity and break away from parental influences. This may be as much about or more about you and your child than God and your child. For more information and encouragement, you may want to check out www.family.org.
A: If your child is open to discussions or reading, you can have conversations along the lines of what you’ve seen on this blog. For instance, there is a lot of data that clearly refutes the issue of the Bible changing with each translation. If your child is not open to these kind of conversations, forcing them is of little help; I know from experience. So then, what do we parents do?
As difficult as it is, I think we follow the lead of the father in the Parable of the Prodigal Son. We allow them to be people with free will and make choices, even if they are bad. I’m not saying we abdicate our position as parents, but that position changes with the age of our children; as one person said to me, “we remain responsible to our children, but no longer responsible for them.” The father let his child go his own way, even with a blessing he didn’t deserve. Then each day, as he went on living his life and working and relating with his other children, he eagerly watched the horizon, ready to embrace his child when the child came to his senses.
For us, I think that looks like daily prayer; by us and by our friends and family. Not the kind of prayer that demands the next thing that happens or that we say to be THE thing that turns our child around, but the kind that is for the long haul. The hard part, especially in our society, is often the child comes over the hill not because of coming to his senses, but just to take more from us. That’s hard, and tough love may be called for. But continue to pray as an act of love to that child, regardless of outcomes.
Then, we live out our faith. We live consistently with Christ’s principles. I found that I was pushing Jesus, but living my life and treating my child with anger, bitterness, fear and frustration. Jesus doesn’t do that. So we find safe, appropriate places to properly deal with our junk, and then we deal with our kids like Christ-centered parents. Easy to say, tough to do, but I think like a lot of things, the hard route is the right one.
Remember, teens and young adults are looking to form their own identity and break away from parental influences. This may be as much about or more about you and your child than God and your child. For more information and encouragement, you may want to check out www.family.org.
2 comments:
The problem is in the perception of 'good things happening to bad people or bad things happening to good people'
Things happen to people, good or bad is in the perception of those things and people.
Maybe they are right. Most of the planet considers the bible either a fraud or mostly untrue. Time for YOU to question the beliefs you take for granted.
Joe Bigliogo
Post a Comment